Oscars?

Someone said to me "hey, Oscar's tonight? What do you think?" yesterday and I got sooo excited. I said aw hellz yeah, I haven't had a raspberry shake since that hooker and I got lost in New Berlin last Valentine's Day. Turns out he was talking about the complete opposite of a nice ice cream treat... the fucking Academy Awards. The Oscars is when a bunch of girls make themselves either look real ugly or real hot, and dudes who had no friends as children because they're so queer get to strut around with them and have their toes fondled because they had the "brilliance" to pretend to be someone they're not. "Scoreboard" though, I guess.

Anyway, the best things that happened were that Slumdog Millionaire won best picture, V. Hudgens showed some leg while making a little song and dance cameo, and Mickey Rourke took part in any capacity. Slumdog and The Reader are the only best picture nominees that I had seen, and The Reader, of course, is garbage.

And now something sweet to get our minds back on track...